I don't know wth I want anymore. Okay except one:

The one/two-week break of doing nothing.

I know I haven't been doing anything much. I neglected all of my obligations. And I know, by tomorrow I'll be on zombie mode - feels dead but actually alive. Not that I don't have enough sleep I do. I just feel like I am dead that's all.

This not-doing-anything-much-while-on-study-leave? Is not that one week that I am asking. Because my brain cannot stop thinking. But not really thinking of what it should be thinking by the way. But something else.

I want to cry but I can't. I want to study, or do work but I am bothered by something that stops me from concentrating.

I don't know what I am doing, I don't know what I am feeling anymore.