Getting the vibes.

I'm trying to get my vibe to do the poster.
I had it. But that was the time I was too busy doing my final assignment for the trisem.

So now I'm gonna start babbling here. mwahahhaa.

What to talk about? The song that I am listening over and over now?

Its Natasha Beddingfield's I wanna have your babies.

I always like her. and her songs. Somehow I can relate her songs to my life. haha.

Oh okay not this one, I mean not the "I wanna have your babies" part. But other lines in the song ada kaitan lah. hehe.

About Babies, they just reminded me of my future. Am I going to have babies when I grow up? fuh giler lah. I can't really predict my future right now. Cuz all this while i've been thinking about how to score. I wonder where I am going to work in the future. Will I ended up as someone I plan to be? Everytime I talk about time for the family in the future, I'll refer the word "family" to my immediate family. Or the extended paling jauh pon. How often am I going to see my parents. How often I'm gonna hang out with the bros. I never thought of 'my own' immediate family. Another branch dat I'm going to start.

Okay maybe I always said if I want to get married, that will be when I am 27 at least. But seriously, its just something that I say. I never put it in my 'future-plan'.

You know, as a girl who's going to be a woman soon, should this be in my plan now? So if I start to create a new family, will that be something that will block my plan for the future? I'll have more responsibilities. Its scary!!

Ah I think I'm trying to say I don't wanna grow up... again.

Why is this something that I fear? I really fear the future. Well for now I'm trying my best to do whatever I can to prepare for it. I don't know how ready I will be later. Or maybe I'll know it when the time comes. But still I need a proper plan!

God I'm nineteen and I still talk about how not-ready I am to face the future? I still think like a kid. I am still indecisive.

Well talking about the preparation. My studies is not stable (but getting better), my cooking skill is zero, and cleaning skill? boleh tahan laa. but I dunno, its not a big room anyway. er.. basically I think I'm not prepared.

Haih enuff of talking about this.

and the mood is till not here.
sheesh.