pyramid, we've built this on a solid rock, it feels just like it's heaven's touch, together at the top (at the top baby), like a pyramid

Currently listening to Charice's Pyramid

Tom: You know what sucks? Realizing that everything you believe in is complete and utter bullshit? It sucks.

Summer: What do you mean?

Tom: Ah you know, destiny, and soul mates, true love and all that childhood fairy tale nonsense. You were right, I  should've listened to you.

Summer: No.. 

Tom: Yeah, why are you smiling?

Summer: Tom...

Tom: What? why are you looking at me like that?

Summer: Well, you know, I guess it's 'cause I was sitting in a deli and reading Dorian Gray and a guy comes up to me and asks me about it and... now he's my husband. 

Tom: Yeah. And... so? 

Summer: So, what if I'd gone to the movies? What if I had gone somewhere else for lunch? What if I'd gotten there 10 minutes later? It was - it was meant to be. And... I just kept thinking... Tom was right. 
Tom: No. 
Summer: Yeah, I did. [laughs] 
Summer: I did. It just wasn't me that you were right about. 

So they played this movie last weekend. I guess this movie always pull people to stick their eyes on the TV and watch. And hating Summer at the end.

LOL. I don't know. At some point I can relate myself to Summer, and at some other point I can relate myself to Tom.

Maybe most of the times Tom. haha.

Anyhoo.

Sometimes a movie needs to be watched over and over to get to different perspectives of it. Its like what you grasp from it is different every time. Agree?

I don't quite remember what I get from watching it the first time, or the second time. I don't even remember how many times have I watched this movie. I reckon, to include the time I watched on a Sunday night, it would be 3 times? Or 4? tah! Or maybe more? pfft. Whatever.

Maybe the first time is the bitch slap of reality. This is reality. What really happens. You don't always get what you want. You could be wrong; a person whom you think is your soul mate could be not your soul mate. Maybe he/she would just be someone who will open up a different direction in life for you. Who will teaches you something. But not going to be someone who'll spend the whole life with you.

I think that's the first. Was trying to recall my conversation with friends right after this movie. I remembered saying "er.. actually I can relate myself to Summer." hahaha. And then I said "I love this movie. Its real!"

Okay so maybe that's the first thing I picked up in this movie.

This time around? I picked up about fate.

I don't know exactly why only now this thing just clicked in my mind. Obviously because I am getting older and naturally you'll be thinking about it. Duh!. But yeah it just clicked in recently.

But yeah, fate. It sucks you know, to bear the fact that fate doesn't come in easy. If you are lucky, you'll get it early. If you don't, you'll be anxious and bitter just to wait for it. Sometimes you don't have the patience to wait for it, so you'll end up with nothing. You question yourself this everyday "when will be the time for me?" "will it come? or it won't?" "what if you missed it already?".

To be in Tom's shoes at the point where he and Summer had that conversation? Its one of the hardest moments one can get. To know that 1. He/She's not fated to be with you, when you were positive that he/she is supposed to be 'the one'. 2. He/She found hers first! and you? You're alone! 3. You have got to be happy, or at least pretend that you are happy for him/her with sincerity.

And yeah, to get reminded again, that fate doesn't come in easy, and your time is not now. And those questions starting to pop in mind. That sucks big time.

But that is life. You just have to accept it. Like how I just accepted fate. Apparently I just realized that over time, I lose myself not believing in fate anymore. Or rather, I believe that I am destined to be alone.

Whatever it is its dangerous. Because fate is what I have to believe in. Its what Qada' & Qadar is about too, well correct me if I'm wrong.

I admit, at my age? I shouldn't give up on anything. But somehow it feels like I have given up. Like I am trying to learn to be alone. Its some kind of a preparation, maybe.. ugh hopefully not! I don't want to die being a bitter old virgin. er OK.

So yeah. I should go back to square one right? Bismillah.

p/s: I think Fox Searchlight Pictures is awesome. I love their movies. Most of them. So is the (500) Days Summer OST. What I noticed about the movie in the first place anyway - awesome soundtrack :)