Currently listening to Bon Iver's Blindsided
Despite the fact that I did some less emotional posts just recently, I am still a mess. And I am way behind of my schedule. My schedule of everything; work, study, even life. It's like life is a pause, but not really a pause cuz everyone else is still moving. Which left me, crawling like a turtle. Or maybe, even a turtle can go past me.
Okay this is not supposed to be a sappy post. Well it sounded like one though. The reason why I decided to post up something is so that maybe my brain will work. Today has been very unproductive. Yesterday was way better, at least I did something. Today even the internet decided to slow down. *sigh* Hence why its effing hard to go into my employer's network. ughh I need to do some work!
I also made a playlist which is supposed to help in keeping me awake and maybe boost my mood to concentrate. It contains songs that have lyrics that I can't understand or comprehend (Actually its Sigur Ros lol) so that I won't pay attention to the story of the songs, and some instrumental stuff. Okay and some mellow songs, which can help as well. I think.
Did it help? To be honest, it helps, but a bit. I can stay awake :) But, firstly, I think I lost the playlist, I guess there are too many playlists in my iPod til it cannot take another one. So now I just simply choose whatever I want to listen. Secondly? I tend to get distracted. You know how music can make a still picture become alive & moving?
Okay not literally, you still need your imagination.
While I was studying my mom joined me at the 'meja besaq' area, cuz that is where she paints as well. She's finishing her "pancake rocks" scenery. And when I took my break from staring at the notes, I will watch her paint. I envy her, but that's not the point. You know how Sigur Ros' songs are always like inspiring, or makes you think about how beautiful life is, how beautiful everything is in this world? Yeah, so thats when I get distracted. Somehow my mind was in NZ. Watching the waves bashing to the rocks. With the beautiful blue sky and puffy clouds. That's when I feel the peaceful-ness. Just me, the waves, the rocks, the coulds and the sky.
Its always like this. Sigur Ros always reminded me of NZ. Maybe its because I listen to them too much. Like how everytime I listen to Hoppipolla and suddenly I feel like I was walking along the Terrace/ walking up to the Botanical Garden/ making my way to Kaffe Eis, or just breathing thru the smell of my room while lying on the floor, staring at the ceiling/ the green outside.
This is the problem when you tend to create the soundtrack of your life. Like Hoppipolla is associated to the year 2009. or Fix You is the song for the year 2007. etc.
I am always distracted. If I turn off these songs, I'll get sleepy.
And to be honest, it's not that easy to concentrate when you have other things to do. I wish I can just spend a day and try to finish whatever I can, but how? if my mom finds out I'll be doomed! I am hoping that I can do that tomorrow. Tonight and tomorrow, so I can study peacefully.
...yeah right.
Better get my life organized before everyone is going to come after me.
Okay just when I have the mood to study, my mom ajak me to go and visit my ex-teacher. She's going off for Hajj.
Alhamdulillah :)
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