Stay positive when negativity surrounds you. Smile when others frown. It’s an easy way to make a difference.

Have you ever wondered, if you're an animal, which one would you be?

Haha. Its one lame, teenage-like thought. Or is that kiddy-ish? Well, from time to time I will go back to this kind of thought. I don't know, maybe cuz I want to just think of something less serious, like this one, once in awhile you know? It's tiring to be hearing a lot about the world problems, then about all the dramas happening in your country, then down to the problems faced in the society, then your workplace... then the things you faced daily, or the things others faced in their lives.

Hearing them, then facing them, then thinking about them. Its tiring. Really.

So yeah. If you're an animal, which one would you be?

Cats have always been one of my favorites. Like duh! Especially by reading the content of this blog, or going through tumblr, you'd know =P The sidebar is pretty obvious already too. LOL. Well, they're still my favorites, its just that somehow I blog about them less and less. I have three now at home;  Juliet, Marco & Ollie. Maybe you know Ollie, she's Ossy's sister. The pretty one. Yes, she's still alive, Alhamdulillah. Going 6 years now. Which is rare for us, because usually the cats who live with us don't live more than 5 years!

Juliet & Marco is the two new ones we've picked up from the market. They're dying at that point of time, so we tried to safe and yeah, we did =)

Let's save those stories for later shall we? Okay, I don't know when, but I know they could be one of my 'happy stories' that I need to share.

Do I want to be cats?

To be honest? Not really. I don't know why, I want them. I want to have them. I need to have cats at home. But I don't wanna be them. They're interesting. People, such as my mom, always think some of them are stupid. But I think otherwise. Cats, are generally, one of the smartest, cunning, cuutee & curious creatures. Yes, sometimes they appear stupid, but that is just a trick up on their paws people. Its because they're smart that they 'act' stupid. So humans will follow what they want.

Over time, especially for the past few years, I realized that I've grown to love birds. Back then, I remembered making my grandfather feeling guilty because he likes to keep birds at home, caged. I told them they have to be free.., its torturous for them to see the world so wide, yet they can't travel around it. They can't fly.

But that's it. I never find the joy of watching birds, or maybe because they're not that tamed enough for humans to touch, hence why. They're like the fishes... I don't find the joy of watching them too. At first. Now? Not anymore =) They're all calming bunch.

And yeah, somehow I have bird pendants, bird cage pendants, love birds ring... if I'm not mistaken I do have a bird-print shirts. Or just the feathers.

I'm pretty much quite obsessed over birds now.

I still have a dream to own one, but with condition that bird does not need to be caged. You know which bird do I want as pets? An owl. Yes. I want an owl. They're amazing creatures! They're nocturnal, they looked a bit serious but they can be very manja you know? Haih. If only I can own one.

So I associated myself, and my two other friends Aqilah & Ain as the penguins. Why do I like penguins? They're like one of my favorite birds.

Watch "March of the Penguins". Then you'll see, how family-oriented they are. How they'll choose their partner, down to how they keep the egg warm & safe, to how do they find their family after months and months of being apart. How they share the food with their kids. Well the way they move is kinda cute too! And I like how they never forget each other by how their voice sound like. Its amazing, beautiful. MashaAllah.

Then, there's peacocks. Well I know that I like them especially because of their beautiful feathers! But that only applies to the male ones, is it? I am not too sure but if I'm not mistaken, the females do not have those pretty feathers. They're pretty dull. Haha. In animal world, its always the male who has that attractive trait. They're suppose to attract the females. Or is it just the bird's world? Nah I think even fishes are like that. So more than two types of animals.. hence I can generalize now? Heh.

But peacocks seem to be a bit cocky to me. So, yeah, my admiration towards them are only limited towards their beauty. And that's it.

There are other birds that I like too, like you know, pigeons, hornbills, flamingos, parrots, toucans, and I don't know about them that much. But I'm fascinated by their beauty.

Another one, that I love, which I think its quite obvious that most girls love them, would be... surprise surprise, the Swans.

Why? One word. Graceful.

Yes, I know, they can be fierce. At my kampung, I remember briefly that one of my bros was chased by them. HAHA. Kacau lagi.

But still, as you see them move on the water? Do you agree with me now? Oh, and I found this fact..

And it made me love swans even more.

Even earlier this year, when my mom wanted to buy me a Pandora charm for my birthday, we were entitled for one free animal charm. And that's what I've chosen. A swan. And the reason being is that I want to be reminded that, I am graceful or I want to be graceful, and I will live with grace.

I define grace as 'beauty from within'. I want to be looked at and people will see that 'grace' within me.   So I have to stripped off those hatred within me, try to be all positive on every aspect of my life. To be more accepting on any madness brought to me, not to be bitter anymore, to have faith in Him, and myself that one day, everyone will see that grace is shining through me. And I'll shine it to those who are around me.

In sha Allah.

Grace is my current favorite word. FYI.
And yeah. Swans :P

Have you ever looked fear in the face and said I just don't care?

Currently listening to Mogwai's I Love You, I am Going to Blow Up.
okay, the title above is not from Mogwai - actually, this band only does instrumental rock stuff. I discovered them from Last.fm-pages-hopping and I think they're cool ;)
Anyway, the title above is from Pink's Glitter in the Air.

It is reflecting how I am feeling now, or at least what I want to feel right now. I just finished my first ever CPA Australia paper, and I have to say that I am not very proud. I know I could have done better, but given my current state of mind, I dare say that I've tried my best.

So now I am just praying hard that I will pass. Aminn.

I am now very tired up to the point that I just feel like throwing up. Is that even possible? Haha I don't know. Lately I just have that feeling-to-throw-up. Its been going on for days. Sometimes I think its because of my iron deficiency problem, which apparently agreed by my mom.

To be honest I don't know if its confirmed that I still have iron deficiency (or if I actually have other types of anemia.. as far as I can remember its written on the medical report in 2007 (thats 3 yrs ago!) that I have iron deficiency, and another check up in 2009 stating that my blood pressure is low, but its the normal low. However I cheated by taking the iron pill the night before shhhhhh) but the last time I checked when I went to see the doctor (which is a few months back), she did commented on my low blood problem and asked the same questions; do you feel like wanting to faint? how can you walk with this kind of condition??? anddd do you exercise a lot? no?.. okay you're weird (okay the you're weird remark came from only from one doctor =P). My brother Firdaus sometimes commented that I looked pale.

Maybe I should really do another check up to confirm. ah well. Looking up at wikipedia, which I don't know if we can rely on this 100% (but it seems alright) and some other random medical websites, I do have the symptoms. Ah, I am taking iron pills on (almost) daily basis together with other supplements so let's hope that's enough. I can go for a jog without feeling like passing out so I am fine, right?

But the jog is only for like 10 - 15 minutes? la la la la la la- Why is there mosquito at this hour? it's annoying! Its been a LOONNGG time since we had a lot of mosquitos in the house. Better find the source and kill them all. *sigh*

ugh enough of this. I wanted to blog about something else but yeah here I am babbling about something else. pfftt..

Anyway, apart from the exam, the rest of the day has been, relaxing. I've got my alone time so I feel good. I get to feast my eyes with Pandora beads - yes, Pandora has opened in Bangsar! And I just found out that they have one outlet at Empire Subang and opening up another one in Pavillion. Apparently Habib has started selling Pandora awhile ago, it's just that they don't have that Pandora boutique until just recently.

Sadly in NZ its much cheaper, which is sad because I am like so far away from NZ.

But better not fret. Well at least they have outlets nearby yes? And maybe that should be a reason why I must only buy for special occasion ;)

Then after feasting my eyes, I went to have my favorite Chawan's Nasi Lemak Bungkus. Thank God they still have them during lunch/tea time and since I didn't have proper breakfast earlier, so I made it my brunch. Haha. Or rather, Brunch + Tea?

And then I drove home, feeling contented :)

Now I am wasting my time before starting a (hopefully) rigorous study schedule to make sure that I can pass my next paper.

Which will be in 4 days time.

Hurm.

I have another 2 posts that I would like to make - one post on music, and another post on fashion. 4 posts pending now. pffttt...

Its always times like these when I think of you and I wonder if you ever think of me.

Currently listening to Vanessa Carlton's A Thousand Miles.

I first heard of this from one of my darling bitches Nana. She was the one who discovered this. Its from Denmark. I think its the new kind of charm bracelet and better one too; you screw the charms in instead of you hook the charms on the bracelet. So its much safer.

At first I didn't think of getting one for myself. Well, number one its quite pricey if I were to buy a set of beads (the charms are called beads) & the bracelet. It can go up to NZD1000+. But if I were to collect one by one, I am afraid that I stop collecting when I get back - they don't have a store here in Malaysia.

But then, during my graduation... that was in 2008. In December to be exact, and my parents came for the event. On the way home, instead of we flew to Auckland, parents decided to drive up. So we stopped by at a very nice and quiet city New Plymouth and while we were passing by the antiques and jewelry stores after breakfast, Ayah saw this. That attracted him to go into the store to find out more about it.

He's interested. And he thought that I should start a collection. A new way to commemorate all the important events happened/happening in my life. One bead that tells one story. And also, later when I am older I can pass this down to my daughter/grand daughter as a family heirloom. That was the perfect timing too as I just graduated kan - one of the important events in my life. So he bought me the bracelet, and two beads.

That's the start of everything. I started to collect this. Slowly.

My collection is still small - not many important events happened in a year kann. But now I am back in Malaysia, its even harder to find the beads. The nearest store to us Malaysians is in Singapore. And I have compared the prices, somehow NZ is selling a wee bit cheaper than Singapore. I wonder why.

But yeah, Pandora doesn't sell only the charm bracelets, they're also selling other jewelries. You can put the charms on the necklace, and also if I'm not mistaken they have customized rings. Not so sure about that ehe. But the rings look pretty cool. Check out their store to see what's there!

Last week my parents went down to Singapore so I kirim-ed them a few beads for me. From what they heard, they are planning to open one store in Malaysia! woo hoo!! :D

Let's hope thats true. Aminn.

Well, if you want to start this kind of collection in Malaysia you can always opt for Thomas Sabo. Those ones are pretty cool too. Plus, they have Ariel, the Little Mermaid charm! damnnn.

Before this, I always think of charm bracelet as something what someone would buy to a girl to express how much she meant to that person. Don't know why I didn't think of it as something someone can buy to herself to tell her life story.