P/S: I love you Kak Nah.

Mentally tired. I am. I know I am suppose to be going to class right now, but I couldn't care less. Besides, I know I won't be listening to a word he said in a condition like this.

The news from Ibu was too sad. Have I mentioned about a woman whom I called Kak Nah? Well, to some who don't know, shes one of the maids who have worked with us. And she stayed the longest. She's luqman's baby sitter. And to us, shes a part of our family.

Sadly she had to leave after 7 years of being with my family. Its because she failed her medical exam. We found out that shes a carrier of hepatitis B. Although she can't work with us anymore, being a carrier doesn't stop us from seeing her again. Occasionally she'll come down to Bangi from Thailand.

Actually, she has been unlucky since she was little. She has her own version of "The Series of Unfortunate Events". Because of that she claims we she is the happiest whenever shes with us. And we are happy to have her in our family.

Since she stopped working with us, she continued studying. Shes a smart woman. Well the reason she worked for us is because she needs the money. To support her family in Thailand, and also for her education. Things were better. At that period of time.

Well, I haven't seen her since the day I flew off. She sent me to the airport. and that is the last time I saw her.

She supposed to visit my family in August 2006. But she failed to come. Something really bad happened to her.

She has a tumor in her brain.

She undergo the whole operation. And because of that, she lost her sight. She becomes blind. At first she can't walk, and she can't talk too. But her determination gave her the ability to walk, and to talk as rewards.

I talked to her occasionally just to know her conditions. She always tell me how sad she is when the doctors told her she can't get her eyesight back.

I kept on telling her this : "Kak Nah, itu doctor yang cakap. Bukan Allah. Kak Nah doa everyday okay? We pray for you too"

I think she's been doing good. Although there are some bad things happened to her along the way (like how a portion of her money we sent to her was taken by the heartless family member of hers), we are still glad that she is coping up well with all obstacles that she has to go through.

But I couldn't help but to cry all night long when I heard the last night's news.

I don't know how I can imagine this, but Ibu told me that since the last 2 years, the doctors do not replace her skull back to her head. Maybe its just a small part of the skull. My mom sent more money so that an artificial skull can cover her head. No lubang. I honestly cannot even imagine this whole thing. It sounded so unreal. And if its true, it sounded mean. Why can't they replace it way earlier? Why must wait for 2 freaking years?

Honestly, to me this is way too much for her. She suffered all her life. I never met a person as unfortunate as her. Whenever I heard of her talking, I just feel like crying. I don't want her to listen to me feeling sad for her.

....

I don't know what to say anymore. No words can describe how sad I am for her. I wish I can be with her all the time. I wish I can take care of her like how she took care of me.

God, I really really really want to see her. I miss her.

I'll just call her tonight. I want her to hear me. Maybe thats enough support from me.

To everyone, especially the ones who know her, please, pray for her. Pray to God to at least lighten the burden for her.